Volunteer for Ridicule

Sometimes being nice can get you into trouble. I'm a pretty trustworthy person, but by no means am I perfect. I do as much as possible for the people around me. If asked, I'll do anything for anybody. However, sometimes this characteristic does more harm than good.

People have a habit of taking advantage of my helpful nature and sometimes I get volunteered to do things, I really shouldn't be doing for those outside of my immediate family. Moving a table, fixing a light fixture, lending out my stuff, not a problem. Video tape an important event, next time I'll stay away.

Documenting events in a families life should be reserved to those who have a blood relation to that family. That way if you screw it up, people will forgive you faster. I don't need people talking behind my back or giving me shit for trying to help. If you don't like the way things turned out, too bad! You should have done it yourself. Certain people should know better than to pass the buck to someone they are not related too without asking. Life is not a game of hot potato: you self-serving, lazy, do-nothing-for-no-one-but -myself worthless waste of space. Leave me out of it next time. I'll pitch in another way, if you don't like it ask someone else.

I know it can very difficult to run a restaurant, however some restaurant owners take themselves too seriously. Just because you taught a bunch high school students to cook your generic menu and clean your poorly decorated hole in the wall does not make you important. No one cares that you are in charge. In fact I'm sure half your staff is making fun of you behind your back. Your probally bald fat and divoreced. You spend all your time at work and prepetually smell like bad lunch meat.

I think Bluetooth headsets are the most annoying device invented in the 21st Century. I can understand if you want to use it in your car, but do you really need to wear this star trek accessory when your shopping at target. Bluetooth is not a status symbol, and you are not that important. The rest of us are not impressed. We do not want to hear you talk to your mother about your inappropriate rash or your wife about your mid life crisis.

I'm afraid of Alpacas they look like the love children of snuffalufagus and a handicapped giraffe. I think alpaca farmers are planning to use hordes of these demented animals to help them conquer the world.